without expression

there was a time when i felt i could write poetry on anything and everything and with much ease. yes, i was that arrogant and am really really sorry for that. there was a time when i thought i could manage three different blogs, delhidreams, thinkpot and dillinama (my unborn photo blog). yes, i did have plans to start a photo blog too and that was the surprise i was talking to howdy and others.
not now.
blogging is becoming increasingly difficult these days. even to talk about more mundane things like what i’m doing right now. for that twitter is easier. and for staying in touch, facebook is there.
my blogs were my expression. i think i’ve lost that faculty for the time being.
and it is a stupid cycle. the more i get bogged down with ‘not writing a poem or a blog post’ the more incapable i become.
i am on the net, it is my addiction. for five working days a week, till the time i don’t have an internet connection at home (and i don’t think dee will ever approve of that!) i am on the net, non-stop, reading, surfing, sharing, enjoying, whiling away my time. but all of that still is a passive experience.
what i’m missing is that creative spirit, that active moment of actually writing something of my own, of creating a new blog post or even taking a new photograph and wondering at the fragility of a creative moment. that internal urge is not manifestating itself well enough.
and god knows, i am dying slowly because of this. well, kinda.
anyways, have imported the complete thinkpot blog into delhidreams. will not start the new blog either.
is it just a temporary block?
i don’t know.
feel like well, without words…

Alanis Morisette – What if God was one of us
via FoxyTunes


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